3 reasons you may find it easy to see what others should be doing, but you are regularly confused about your own direction.

• Is it really easy for you to see what everyone should be doing but when it comes to you, you have no idea what to do?

• Are you the one who is always giving advice to friends, family & co-workers? And yet you are regularly confused about your own direction?  

• Do you have a clear visual of the path others should take, yet your own looks overgrown & foggy? 

• Or maybe you are the one that always offers unsolicited advice, so busy trying to help others that you can’t implement that same advice in your own life?

Here’s the 3 most common reasons my clients can support others but not themselves:

1- Taking on other people’s problems can make it hard to see our own- As empaths, there is a tendency to over-feel! So when someone reaches out for your advice or guidance, putting yourself in the shoes of the advice seeker makes it easy to take on the emotions that are attached to the story, cramming your body with extra emotions that don’t belong to you. These extra emotions add to the inner noise and it can make it hard to differentiate what belongs to you and what you may be carrying for others, adding to the fog that’s covering your own path forwards.   

2- The saviour that wants saving - A common trait I see in my clients is that of becoming the saviour .  This one is huge and can be the root cause for a ton of behavioural characteristics. Unmet needs from their past ( the moments they wish someone would have waded in and taken charge to change their reality) ends up being the driving force for them to fill that requirement in other people’s lives. The thought of wishing someone would have heard and held them in their hour of need and the relief that would of given them, leads them to trying to be this for others. 

3- Bypassing your own needs-  Its always easier to advise others than to take a leaf out of our book is another common, unconscious  trait , I see a lot of.   Helping and advising others being used as a distraction tactic. All of a sudden you are too busy cleaning up other people’s issues, that you no longer have time to sit with the things you need to work on for yourself. You can carry on telling yourself everything is “fine” nothing to see here ! ( I guess this could go down on the numbing behaviours list ) resulting in you wandering off down someone else path, leaving yours to overgrow a little more. 

The top 3 questions I ask my paying clients to sit with, to start the healing process on this are; 

• Are you guiding others from a place of observation or need? ~ Is helping others from a purely observational state, or is it stemming from your subconscious desire to be needed or be seen as the wise one with all the answers ? 

• Are you trying to distract your self ? ~ If yes, I would suggest digging a little deeper and asking what it is you are not wanting to address in your own environment?

• If you were to befriend yourself and offer advice or guidance to yourself on your current situation, what would you say ?~ I know it might sound lame, but seriously, you rock at helping others and offering your perspective, so flip the narrative and write down what you would suggest to a friend in this situation. 

 If you feel like you lack direction and are not sure which way to turn try this free quiz 

https://www.soulremedy.uk/quiz 

You may want to sit with these questions, either with your journal or in meditation.  I’d love to hear what comes up for you  if you feel called to do so drop me an update HERE

www.soulremedy.uk